fightingofthespirit: (#@%!!)
Klarth F. Lester ([personal profile] fightingofthespirit) wrote2009-02-08 06:54 pm
Entry tags:

Mahou Sensei Kuraasu!

Odin's beard!  Hundreds of books or so here, and you'd think at least one of them would say something about this ridiculous island.  I spent hours flipping through the most asinine reading material -- But nope!  Nothing.  Nada.  Zilch.  So all I've got, in the end, is the name.  Pfah.  Memento Eden.  'Memento', meaning remembrance, and 'Eden' in reference to original paradise.  Does that sound about right?  So, what -- it takes our memories and keeps us bound here to this 'Eden' with endless ocean in place of flaming seraphim and sword?  The name doesn't even make any bloody sense.  Sounds like a retirement home where the aged go off and die.

I suppose I managed to accomplish my secondary objective.  To the young lady who inquired as to whether or not I was a mage, the answer is a resounding no.  Which correlates precisely with the observation that every single one of my tomes is, in fact, a book of magic, because clearly, nothing in this place can ever make sense or else it would spontaneously implode.  The only positive that's come out of this so far are the half-dozen magic theory texts currently sitting in my bedroom waiting to be read.

In the meantime, I've signed myself up for a job.  What sort of appalling education system allows any random stranger off the street to be qualified to mold the minds of the children?  Worked out in my favor, though.  I should probably find out what Home Economics is before class starts tomorrow; hold on.

. . . Ah.  Here we are.  'A field of formal study including such topics as consumer education, institutional management, interior design, home furnishing, cleaning, handicrafts, sewing, clothing and textiles, cooking, nutrition, food preservation, hygiene, child development, and family relationships.'  . . . What?  . . . Nutrition?  We don't get a choice here!  Interior design, cleaning; child de -- I refuse to teach sex ed. 

This is ludicrous.  I never had to learn any of this in school.

. . .

Listen up, class!  We meet in the front of the library tomorrow; it's warm enough.  Bring a table saw if you have one.  We'll be working on the 'handicrafts' section of this subject from now until . . . I resign, I suppose.  Or I die.  Don't worry, kids; I'm expecting high blood pressure to kick in any time now.

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 02:21 am (UTC)(link)
. . . No one's forcing you to. I certainly don't mind if you skip.

You'll fail, though, of course.

[identity profile] no-good-tsuna.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 02:22 am (UTC)(link)
Then I can't really skip, can I? Though I probably will skip a few classes...

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 02:31 am (UTC)(link)
Does it really matter if you do well in school on this island?

[identity profile] no-good-tsuna.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 02:35 am (UTC)(link)
For certain reasons no one here can fully appreciate, yes.

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 02:42 am (UTC)(link)
. . . You're a bit young for masochism, too.

Well, I'll expect you bright and early tomorrow, then. What time is my class, anyway . . . And be a good kid and find a table saw, won't you? I'll give you extra credit.

[identity profile] no-good-tsuna.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 02:50 am (UTC)(link)
Extra credit? I've never gotten extra credit before. There might be one at the lumber place...

[identity profile] bestgameever.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 03:33 am (UTC)(link)
Haha, okay! Sounds fun.

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 03:51 am (UTC)(link)
. . . It does?

I mean. Good to see an eager spirit, young man. I'll look forward to seeing you in class.

[identity profile] bestgameever.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 03:53 am (UTC)(link)
I'll be there!

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 03:55 am (UTC)(link)
For my own reference, may I have your name? You may address me as Professor Klarth.

[identity profile] bestgameever.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 03:56 am (UTC)(link)
Takeshi Yamamoto. Nice to meet you, Professor Klarth!

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 03:58 am (UTC)(link)
Right, then. Good to meet you as well.

Do his eyes ever open . . .

[identity profile] bestgameever.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 03:59 am (UTC)(link)
What are we making tomorrow, Professor Klarth?

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 04:02 am (UTC)(link)
Egads! . . . He must have heard me . . . You can keep them closed, keep them closed!

It's a surprise.

Someone must like surprises . . .

[identity profile] bestgameever.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 04:04 am (UTC)(link)
Haha, okay!

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 04:07 am (UTC)(link)
Whew.

Bring tools, by the way, if you have any.

[identity profile] bestgameever.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 04:12 am (UTC)(link)
Haha? What kind of tools?

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 04:14 am (UTC)(link)
Construction tools. Or even just scissors and glue, if you've got that.

[identity profile] bestgameever.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 04:17 am (UTC)(link)
Hahaha, okay!

[identity profile] regina-incendia.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 08:33 am (UTC)(link)
*Facepalms*

Backgrounds checks may be impossible, but making sure an applicant knows what the position entails? That at the very least should be enforced.

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 02:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Precisely. Your system is in grave need of an overhaul to prevent the unqualified from misleading the children.

[identity profile] regina-incendia.livejournal.com 2009-02-09 10:06 pm (UTC)(link)
That I will certainly agree with.

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-10 01:52 am (UTC)(link)
Thus, if I absolutely must instruct them in 'child development', I shall expect your cooperation in dealing with the females of the class.

[identity profile] regina-incendia.livejournal.com 2009-02-10 01:55 am (UTC)(link)
...

I believe that is what the 'health class' run by Doctor McNinja is for.

[identity profile] shoukanjutsu.livejournal.com 2009-02-10 02:30 pm (UTC)(link)
. . . Thank the gods.

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